CONSTIPATION

 Dear Breda, My seven year old son suffers from constipation.  Can you recommend any natural remedies to help?  Thanks.  Rachel.

Dear Rachel,

An old Chinese proverb states “There is no disease but stagnation, no remedy but circulation.”  Our large intestine is about 5 feet long and our small intestine about 20 feet, so at one level, it is amazing that anything finds its way through our body!  Although constipation in itself is not an illness, it is a symptom that something is wrong.  Does your son have a poor diet?  Is there stress in his life?  Is he exposed to certain toxic substances?  Is he on mediation which has side-effects?  Is he getting enough exercise?  Is he using constipation as a means of grabbing your attention?

Constipation can be extremely uncomfortable, and may lead to a general state of lowered health, with sluggishness both physically and mentally.  If not treated, it can lead to bad breath and body odour, haemorrhoids, diverticulitis (infection / inflammation of the large intestine) and other health ailments.

I have seen children with constipation who have perfect diets, so it is important to understand the other potential factors, such as constitution, genetics, lifestyle, emotional upset, geopathic and electromagnetic stress.  Whilst diet is the most common reason for constipation, I have seen many patients – especially children - where the maintaining cause was something quite different and not immediately obvious.   All things considered, the following advice may be of assistance:

Diet: the best sources of fibre are grains, legumes, fresh fruit and vegetables.  Introduce slowly as they can cause gas and diarrhoea.

Drink 6 to 8 glasses of water daily.

Add linseeds or flaxseeds to your son’s cereals. 

Take one tablespoon of olive oil with the juice of one lemon just before bedtime and upon getting up in the morning.  This helps to stimulate liver function, and improves overall digestion and elimination of food.

Certain foods such as milk, cheese, white flour products and iron supplements can cause constipation.  Record and scrutinise your son’s diet, as there may be something obvious which is causing the problem.

It is sometimes useful to get your son to sit on the toilet at the same time ever day.  This may create a signal to the body to defecate.

I have found homeopathic remedies to be extremely gentle and effective in treating constipation.  The most common ones used are Nat Mur (aids assimilation and absorption, and treats emotional upset), Lycopodium (aids liver function, enhances appetite and boosts confidence), Nux Vomica (number 1 remedy for irritable bowel syndrome, helps to ground and balance the energy in the body), and Pulsatilla (aids circulation and self-esteem, and is great for constipation if craving dairy products). 

If diet is the underlying cause of your son’s constipation, the above advice may help, but as ever, it is important to play the “health detective.”   By this I mean taking a dispassionate look at your son’s life and considering whether there are other factors at play: did the problem start when he changed school, began taking a certain medication or eating a certain food, moved house or lost a loved one?  Diet is the common maintaining cause of constipation, but be aware that there are many other potential causes too.

DOGS, NOT DIAMONDS!

 Regular readers will know that I am a big dog lover.  Last week I wrote about the delights of walking by my local rivers with our two rescue dogs, and how we should let energy flow through our bodies like the rivers flow through the countryside.  After writing that article, I began to think about how not just rivers but also dogs have so many lessons to teach us.

When I get home from work, my two dogs Sunny and Sylvie don’t greet me with complaints about how tired they are, or how difficult their homework is, or how bad the weather is.  They are simply overjoyed to welcome me home.  Think about it when you get home next, or when you are welcoming a loved one home: do you bound to the door with delight, or do you growl and complain about your day?  Which welcome would you rather receive?

Our dogs also enjoy the simple things in life.  Sometimes, when she is out walking (or more accurately, running!), Sunny will just take a huge jump for joy: she is totally alive, living for the moment, and enjoying herself.  She is not thinking about all the complications in her life: she is just running free and revelling in the world around her.  When was the last time you did that?

The only thing Sunny and Sylvie love more than their walks is their “rubadubs.”  They are both very affectionate dogs, and everyone in our family regularly strokes and pets them.  The dogs appreciate the attention, and it’s really relaxing and rewarding for the person doing the stroking … so maybe we should show the same amount of affection and care to the loved ones around us!

Dogs never judge us.  They love us unconditionally and don’t bear grudges.  We can talk to them and they will listen to our problems without answering back.  They do not expect too much – just feeding, walking and stroking - and they greatly appreciate everything that we do for them.  Above all, they are loyal and love us for who we are.  You know, I think Marilyn Monroe was wrong.  Diamonds are not a girl’s best friend – dogs are!

THE RIVER OF LIFE

In Thomastown where we live, we are very fortunate to be within five minutes walk of two charming rivers from Kilfane and Mong.  They are beautiful small rivers that babble and flow with such vigour that they can only bring joy.  When I get up early in the morning to walk by the two rivers, our two rescue dogs Sunny and Sylvie can hardly believe their luck: their howls of delight are almost human!

I have to confess that I am no great fan of jogging.  My first attempt at doing a 10k fundraising jog ended up with me fainting and waking up in an ambulance.  I was taken to Jervis St Hospital where I had worked as a student nurse – all very embarrassing!  The problem was that I had done no training for the run, even though I thought I was fit and expected to do well.  My lifestyle then simply didn’t include enough exercise: I now know that we need to move our bodies to stay healthy.

So although I still don’t enjoy running, with nature in on my doorstep, I find it easy to gently jog to the rivers with our dogs.  As I sit by the riverbank, I reflect that we too have a river that runs through us: the blood that flows through our body.  When we are working with this energy flow, moving our body, being fully present in life and supporting the flow with positive thoughts, then we are like the river that flows freely in the right direction with no blockages to affect its energy.  But how many of us try to swim against the natural flow of life?  We criticise ourselves, we worry too much, we are too sedentary, and we fail to shift the negative debris that can block our flow at any time.    

Often I will see a branch or stick caught in the middle of the river, but when I return the next day, it has been washed away.  We need to take the same approach with the debris that clutters up our own lives – simply imagine that it has been washed away and can no longer interrupt our natural flow!

Every time we walk, jump or run, our cells benefit from the fact that we are moving, helping the energy in our bodies to flow in the right direction, and making us feel better both inwardly and outwardly.  So like those rivers, get moving!

BE IN TOUCH

“To live in the hearts of those we love is never to die.” (Thomas Campbell)

“Seeing death as the end of life is like seeing the horizon as the end of the ocean.”  (David Searls)

 

When someone we love dies, it is important to keep their memory alive.  You can create a wonderful feeling of being in touch with them in a number of ways.  You can continue to share the ups and downs in your life with them in your mind.  You can tell them what you think and figure out what they might say back to you.  You can imagine phoning them to tell them of something that happened or how mutual friends and relations are doing.  Or you can do something practical like planting a rose bush or apple tree in their memory.

One of my favourite books on this subject is “There are no Goodbyes” by Paddy McMahon (see www.paddymcmahon.com).  It’s a wonderful read and helps people to understand the process of life and death.  Having often recommended it, I know his beautifully simple words have brought great comfort, solace and understanding to different family members.

It may sound a little strange, but talking in your mind to loved ones who have passed on is a great way of keeping happy memories of them alive, and can be very comforting. 

My own much-loved uncle recently passed away, and he requested that the following prayer be read out at his funeral in his memory.  It’s a very old prayer that was taught to him by his grandmother when he was a small boy.  I share it in the hope that it too brings some solace to anyone who has lost a loved one and helps to ease their pain.

A Prayer for bedtime

Jesus tender shepherd hear me, Bless thy little lamb tonight

Through the darkness be Thou near me, Keep me safe till morning’s light

All this day Thy hand has led me, And I thank Thee for Thy care

Thou has clothed, warmed and fed me, Listen to my bedtime prayer

Let my sins be all forgiven, Bless the friends I love so well

Take us all at last to Heaven, Happy there with Thee to dwell.

TAKE A MINI BREAK … AND A MINI-MINI ONE TOO!

If you are unable to take a full holiday this year, then why not take a mini-break?  It can be reviving, recharge your batteries and relax your body … and in some respects it can be just as much of a tonic as a proper holiday – no queues at the airport, no visas or passports, no big pack, no big organisation!

Take a day trip or a night away and go to see one of the sights in Ireland you have always wanted to visit but never quite found the time.  It could be somewhere a few hours drive away or it could be on your doorstep: Dublin Zoo, Cork English market and the Titanic exhibition in Belfast, or Hook lighthouse and Kilkenny Castle.  If you are organising a break with your partner, make it a romantic and intimate.  If you are planning a trip with your kids, make it a surprise for them, and bring out your own inner child and sense of playfulness. 

When you take time out, you are showing to yourself that you are worthy of enjoying life.  The universe is mirroring what you are doing to yourself: when it sees you enjoying life, it brings more joy into your life.  So be kind to yourself in your thoughts and in your deeds, and in no time you will feel better.   The process of allowing yourself time to prepare and pack (lightly!) for a day trip or night away can give you as much enjoyment and anticipation as a longer trip, especially if you plan several trips throughout the coming months.

If a mini-break is not possible, then try a mini-mini break!  By this I mean taking a break from your desk or your chores.  Sit down somewhere quiet or better still lie down, close your eyes, and think of something that has nothing to do with work or chores for ten minutes.  Picture yourself on a sunny beach, dancing with friends, ski-ing down a mountain or enjoying a beautiful view: recall a happy memory that makes you feel good.  If your mind wanders, gently guide it back to the original focus.  When you open your eyes, you will feel refreshed again.  Even if you can’t do a mini-mini break at work, do this exercise as soon as you get home to feel the benefits.

Whether it’s a mini break or a mini-mini one, the process of allowing time for yourself will bring more peace, more well-being and more happiness into your life and the lives of those around you.  These breaks don’t cost a bunch of time or money to organise (and can even be free), but they are assets that bring in positive abundance into your life.  So what are you waiting for?  Organise that mini-break now, and find a few minutes every day for your mini-mini-break!

FLOWER POWER!

My birthday falls in March, and when my husband and children asked me what I wanted, I replied “My usual gift!” - in other words, flowers for the window boxes and flowerpots outside our house.

It gives me great pleasure and joy to see the window boxes full of flowers with different arrays of colours.  And seeing the daffodils in bloom after the long winter has a positive and uplifting effect on all of us.  Whether we realise it or not, colour can and does affect our mood.  In a similar way, the extra light we are now experiencing in the mornings and evenings has an influence on us.  When we have more light and colour in our lives, we breathe them in and feel it in our cells.  Our cells are sensitive to how we see, smell and feel.  But it is up to us to interpret these senses – do we like what we see or smell?  Do we choose how we feel in the moment of the now?  And if we don’t like something, then make the decision to change it to something more pleasing.  That’s why having flowers in my life always cheers me up – in every sense they really do brighten up my world!

When I was growing up on a farm in Co Galway, my mother took great pride in her flowers.  Our deep window sills were full of geraniums and the smell wafted through the house.  In the garden, the scent of wallflowers filled the air.  To this day, the smell of either of these flowers transports me right back to happy memories of my childhood.   

I took a bunch of flowers into hospital recently when visiting my sister there, but I wasn’t allowed to bring them into the ward.  I couldn’t believe it!  It seems flowers are now seen a source of infection.  What a pity.  At the very least, every hospital ward should have an area dedicated to plants and flowers.  As well as absorbing carbon dioxide and releasing oxygen, I believe that plants and flowers also absorb negativity and release a beautiful energy that helps people to feel happier and more balanced.  You only have to see the reaction of someone receiving an unexpected bunch of flowers to understand this!

When I go to see my elderly mother in the nursing home, I always take her flowers.  She is ninety, has Alzheimer’s, and is unable to talk.  But the smile it puts on her face when I put the flowers in a vase for her says it all, and I know they have cheered her up.  Knowing that it brightens her day each time she looks at her flowers makes me realise how powerful the magical energy of flowers really is.

ADHD - ATTENTION DUE TO HIGHER DIMENSION!

I recently gave a talk to parents whose children have been diagnosed with ADHD (Attention Deficit Hyperactive Disorder).  I see many such children in my clinics.  Parents of ADHD kids may find that their children need very little sleep, are extremely active, have poor concentration and get distracted easily.  They may also have difficulty with absolute authority and do not like being controlled.  If their high energy levels are suppressed with medication like Ritalin, or if they feel like they do not belong, then they may suffer from low self-esteem, a lack of self-belief and no confidence in themselves.

I told the parents that based on my awareness of treating kids with ADHD over the years, I believe that it might also stand for “Attention Due to Higher Dimension.”  Sometimes it seems as if these children have come into this world with a higher – or different – vibration.  They know who they are, why they are here, and what they want to change.  Only they don’t always fit into the parents’ way of doing things, or into the school system (which they may want to change!).  They may have preferred ways of being taught and may resist rote learning, thus wreaking havoc in some cases, all because they simply do not fit in.

Dr David Weeks of the Royal Edinburgh Hospital in Scotland conducted over a thousand interviews with children diagnosed with ADHD.  He found they shared three primary characteristics: (1) a strong will, (2) a good sense of humour and (3) a creative imagination.  I would also add from my experiences that they are often very sensitive: sensitive to certain types of food (ie allergies) and sensitive to other people’s energies, especially if negative!  They can sense integrity and know when they are being lied to.  They almost demand respect and will not give it to others if they feel people are talking down to them.  They can be very compassionate, but may have many fears, particularly of death or of losing a loved one.

If they experience failure in early life, they may give up and develop permanent learning blocks. Sadly, they may then turn their destructiveness on to themselves.  They can also suffer from low blood sugar, leading to mood swings and fatigue problems because their energy levels are unbalanced.  So there are positives and negatives of having kids with ADHD. 

At the end of my talk, a few parents said how lovely it was to focus on seeing ADHD in a positive light, as they felt that often there is negative bias.  Their kids are very imaginative and gifted, and they choose to do only what they want and to work where their gifts lie!  They are here to help create a foundation of honesty and integrity, and to make other people snap out of their cosy existences and see the world in a different way.

So what can be done to help kids with ADHD?

Nutritionally, two things are especially important.  First cut out sugar, as it can interfere with the pancreas, wreaking havoc with the blood sugar levels and hence the child’s mood.  Essential fatty acids (EFA’s) omega 3, 6 and 9 are also very beneficial for children with ADHD.  EFA’s cannot be made by the body and must be ingested.  They can be taken as a supplement, or are found in olive / sunflower / hemp / fish oils.  These EFA’s facilitate the transmission of the nerve impulses that are needed for normal brain functions.  They also support energy metabolism and help us to handle stress.

As parents, teachers, guardians and carers, we all have a responsibility to try and understand these kids and teenagers.  They are very good at sensing integrity and intuitively know when people are lying to them.  In particular, they do not like to be spoken down to.  I have heard the following words on numerous occasions: “I feel misunderstood and nobody really listens to me.  Why can’t people accept me for who I am, and stop trying to change me?” 

Adults have a tendency to believe that we are OK and that the child has the problem.  Kids with ADHD will not allow you to keep deluding yourself!  If you continue to ignore or hide behind your fears, then these children may create havoc.  Frequently, when a child has a behavioural issue, the parents or teachers can get very stressed, lose their perspective and become immersed in the problem.  Children respond to this negative energy and judgement, and their behaviour deteriorates.  It’s not that children live your life, doing exactly what they want when they want without restriction or respect.  Children need parenting.  They need well defined boundaries with consistent and fair discipline.  And they need to be listened to!

Every child comes into this world with a need.  That need is to be “loved.”  This love is unconditional.  You love your child freely for who they are, without placing conditions or judgement on that love.  Love heals all relationships, dissolves all negative behaviours and brings harmony to every situation.      

I sometimes feel that we as a society are guilty of losing perspective about children with ADHD.  Yes, they are different, and yes they can sometimes be hard work … but if we could only step back and focus a little more on all their positive characteristics and attributes, we might see the situation in a different light … and more importantly, the children themselves would feel more appreciated, valued and understood.